Police Say Poop Scooped Into Storm Draini love how the writer used poop in the headline, and feces in the body of the article, like somehow it's real news. i mean, just go for it, dude. use poop the whole time. or crap. like that time i heard the weather man in tucson say, 'the weather for tomorrow--cold and crappy. and then, it had the five day forecast, which read cold and crappy.' it made me immensely happy.
PEN ARGYL
Pen Argyl police are looking for the person who dropped 15 plastic bags filled with dog feces in a storm drain on E. Plainfield Avenue between Davey and Vine streets in the borough.
The bags were discovered by borough employees who were clearing a clogged storm drain, police said Sunday.
The person who tossed the bags in the drain faces charges of scattering rubbish and criminal mischief, police said.
Police ask anyone with information to call them at 610-863-6704.
Monday, September 26, 2005
from the Morning Call's Police Beat
stuff on my cat
you know how i usually detest cutesy cat things, or really, anything involving pictures of cats doing stuff, but carol just sent this site to me, and as i went on and on and looked at more and more pictures, i laughed harder and harder until tears were rolling down my face. to quote the website, "stuff + cats = awesome"
Monday, September 19, 2005
The fourth level of hell: Family circus
today i goto my work mailbox and there is something that looks very similiar to this sitting in there:
fucking bloody hell. the one in my mailbox has fucking billy standing at the door declaring "I untied my shoes all by myself!" holy fuck.
i think i actually threw up a little in my mouth. i once ranted in the lunch room that bill keane needs to die for his mesmorizing and horrible little circular comic strip which, because of its strategic placement and shape, evilly catches your eye sucking you into the hell that is the jeffy dotted line trek through town. it's madness. it's impossible to turn away, yet i think it destroys your soul. 'move to the suburbs' it says. 'buy an suv'. 'vote republican'. i know i am like travis bickle when it comes to family circus, but HOLY crap, who is torturing me? they pick the most painful ones too. i see this little strip of newspaper and i pull it out and say, 'OH for the love of all good and holy, what is this sh...?' and look around, there is some planner somewhere laughing his ass off. lurker, i'm looking at you. they end up in my box every three months or so, the most painful ones to boot.
how can one comic strip suck so much? what disturbs me about this today is that the signature now reads jeff and bil keane. sweet baby jesus, if he is passing his pen off to his son to continue the madness, i'm pretty sure my head will actually explode. i am writing another letter to the inquirer about this. they need to be stopped. and i'm the girl to stop them.
UPDATE: a co-worker admitted to the family circus madness in my inbox. he also sent me his biography, written by bill keane himself.
even his profile is mind-numbingly horrible, and i quote:
"I was born in Philadelphia. Well, I wasn't exactly born, I was discovered there by Benjamin Franklin (Oct. 5, 1922). (yo, Bil, you are killing me.) I grew up in that city with a penn (fucking hell) by my side--William Penn! When asked who cracked the Liberty Bell I replied, "Not me!"--my first association with that invisible gremlin who showed up in "The Family Circus" many years later. "
seriously, what the fuck is wrong with this guy?!?!?! honestly, i had almost successfully blocked the 'not me' invisible gremlin from my consciousness. i can't read anymore of this shit. it's two minutes of my life i will never get back
fucking bloody hell. the one in my mailbox has fucking billy standing at the door declaring "I untied my shoes all by myself!" holy fuck.
i think i actually threw up a little in my mouth. i once ranted in the lunch room that bill keane needs to die for his mesmorizing and horrible little circular comic strip which, because of its strategic placement and shape, evilly catches your eye sucking you into the hell that is the jeffy dotted line trek through town. it's madness. it's impossible to turn away, yet i think it destroys your soul. 'move to the suburbs' it says. 'buy an suv'. 'vote republican'. i know i am like travis bickle when it comes to family circus, but HOLY crap, who is torturing me? they pick the most painful ones too. i see this little strip of newspaper and i pull it out and say, 'OH for the love of all good and holy, what is this sh...?' and look around, there is some planner somewhere laughing his ass off. lurker, i'm looking at you. they end up in my box every three months or so, the most painful ones to boot.
how can one comic strip suck so much? what disturbs me about this today is that the signature now reads jeff and bil keane. sweet baby jesus, if he is passing his pen off to his son to continue the madness, i'm pretty sure my head will actually explode. i am writing another letter to the inquirer about this. they need to be stopped. and i'm the girl to stop them.
UPDATE: a co-worker admitted to the family circus madness in my inbox. he also sent me his biography, written by bill keane himself.
even his profile is mind-numbingly horrible, and i quote:
"I was born in Philadelphia. Well, I wasn't exactly born, I was discovered there by Benjamin Franklin (Oct. 5, 1922). (yo, Bil, you are killing me.) I grew up in that city with a penn (fucking hell) by my side--William Penn! When asked who cracked the Liberty Bell I replied, "Not me!"--my first association with that invisible gremlin who showed up in "The Family Circus" many years later. "
seriously, what the fuck is wrong with this guy?!?!?! honestly, i had almost successfully blocked the 'not me' invisible gremlin from my consciousness. i can't read anymore of this shit. it's two minutes of my life i will never get back
Wednesday, August 31, 2005
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
Monday, August 29, 2005
Monday, August 22, 2005
la chupacabra es muerta.
that bastion of journalistic intergrity, netscape 'fun and games' section, has a story entitiled mexican myth or texas terror? AY. i copy the beginning of the story below with a link to some local news bit. the video is ridiculous, so typical evening news. it looks like a fucking dog, because it is a fucking dog, bitches. D-O-G. come on, now. it doesn't even looks like a goatsucking, bat like creature of the night. plus, it wouldn't look you in the eyes, homes, because then it would have to devour your soul, yo. Is a local Texas television station desperate for ratings or is there something behind the legend of the Chupacabra?
A recent home video of an unidentified animal has Texas residents again pointing fingers at the famed Mexican folklore creature. WOAI Channel 4 in San Antonio broadcast the sighting in June. Watch the WOAI news story. This isn't the first or even second time this suspected "blood-sucking thing from beyond" has claimed fame in the Lonestar State
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)